It seems like the last few months have been a blur. I can't so much recall taking a moment of two out of those passing months to take a look at where I am, have been, and will be. I feel stuck in this same old routine. I wake up, go to work, come home from work and eat, maybe read or play video games and repeat the process. The weekends provide some discourse but not enough as of late. I want to spend time lost in nature, lost in the city or open road far from what I call home. Something I have been missing is the natural meditation loneliness. Temporary loneliness is important to clear one's mental cache, so to speak. I haven't been able to sleep and I believe that my longing for alone time plays a large part in my current insomnia. Recently I've been able to gain temporary happiness; I bought fish, books, ate out a lot, drank with a friend... nothing to satisfy what I'm longing.

On a lighter note, I've been raking in large portions of money as a working stiff. Even though it makes me feel like I'm wasting my life away, it is for a good cause - to get myself through the ominous expense of college. I am, admittedly, a typical American consumer. That is something I'm working on successfully.

Something else I would like to work on successfully is finding more people to hang out with on a regular basis. I love all my friends that I have up here, but it seems like the only time I spend with them is if Katie wants to hang out with them or they with Katie. Although this may be another side effect of working a majority of the time. No time for friends.

I expect soon I will be going to Katie's brain doctor for mental treatment. Probably as soon as my PSE health insurance kicks in. I don't want to be forced into relying on medication but I'm starting to feel at this point nothing else will motivate me.

listening to: Radio: KEXP